hmm hols are over.. promos nearing.. it's tt mood of the year again.. the no-time-to-finish-studying feeling.. the dun-wan-to-do-anithing feeling.. the damn sian feeling.. all set in together.. additive effect to make mi think tt life is sucky.. hmm but thinking of the period of time after promos(or after pw) may serve as a bit of an incentive to push mi on.. perhaps the fear of doing badly in exams again may serve as a motivation.. as the lin2 shi2 bao4 fuo2 jiao3(last min hug buddha leg) person i m.. studying for the test the dae right b4 seems to work for tests.. since sec sch.. buthen ultimately i screw the big exams.. think it's becos exams cover many many more topics than tests.. and i cant get myself to study a few weeks or mths b4 exams.. cuz i haf real bad memory and i juz dun feel like it.. and now promos are dangerously near.. juz a mere 2 wks away.. haix.. gotta REALLY start to study i guess.. or else i'll juz be letting my parents down again.. and oso letting myself down..

was sort of having mondae blues todae early in the morning.. then kind of got warmed up and went quite psycho from late morning all the way until evening.. kobeiz to the bryantz all the waez.. think i got burned out or sth.. feeling quite tired.. and oso an eerie sense of sadness.. this alwaes seem to happen when i get veri hyper for a period of time.. then i'll get veri turned off after tt.. and start feeling down.. weirdo lo.. why liddat..

aiya.. sian.. juz got home not long ago.. sms-ed my mom to tell her leave some food for mi cos i'll be home late for dinner.. then my parents actuallie waited for mi to yi-ta-da-ki-mas! argh.. sometimes make mi feel so guilty.. how i treat them does not reflect on how they treat mi.. alwaes tot "do unto others wad u want others to do unto u" is veri true.. but how come i m so unfairly privileged in the family.. mabbe cos i m the youngest child.. and they pinned real high hopes on mi to probably make sth big in life in the future.. and frens.. haiii.. dunno wad to sae.. m i drifting away again? hopefully not..

walao.. shit.. need to go haf my shower now and start to study for chem test tmr.. not enuff time.. alwaes spend so much time complaining tt i haf not enuff time.. so ironic rite.. and i'll onli realise how little time i haf left when it's reallie close cuz i keep telling myself "aiya.. relax la.. still got time one.." gotta change tt mindset too.. kae.. cya..

t�t:resist.. abstain.. avoid.. seems to be a convenient way out when u encounter a problem.. be it something or someone..