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DayBefore!Misery for the layout.
SwimChick for the brushes.
876-ArcticMonkey-876 @ DA for the images.



Thursday, July 08, 2004
18:39

todae is so so sad.. off to a bad start when i woke up early in de morning.. tot it shud turn better in de dae.. but it got worse instead.. lay on my bed at 11+.. dunno wad time i fell asleep though.. kept tossing and turning.. then i had nitemares and woke up in shock twice at 3+ and 4+.. and finally i had a bad stomachache at 5+.. quite agonizing.. but all these are nothing as compared to pain caused by the one u love de most.. ouch and how much it hurt.. it was ok at first.. i tried to keep talking and initiating and all.. but i couldnt keep going on.. we both went silent for the last half of de journey to sch and nothing said from then on.. i dunno since when.. but u juz dun gif mi de feeling u love mi animore.. u alwaes hide ur hand away from mi.. and all de time it was so hard juz to hold ur hand.. u dun wanna hug mi animore.. our next date.. the next time we'll meet.. going to sch tog or going home tog.. u dun care animore.. issit tt girls hafta wait all de time? we're still living in tt era? haiz i dun expect a lot.. but at least occasionally u shud make mi feel loved rite? i alwaes get v encouraged and gain faith whenever u write to mi and wif all de sweet stuff inside.. but wad use has it when u dun show it? issit my fault? m i expecting too much? i reallie dun know.. i was so sad in sch todae.. i almost cried juz thinking of this during phy lect.. but i managed to keep the tears in somehow.. since last nite i haf been thinking non-stop abt us.. and whenever sth bad abt our relationship comes to mind.. my heart aches so badly i crinch in pain.. hafta take deep breaths to settle down.. i was so so depressed and down.. until i saw u and u gave mi a note.. and i regained my faith again.. but happy times when we're together are juz getting shorter wif each passing dae.. i dun knoe wadz wrong wif us.. or rather wif mi.. but i know we're both not happy.. esp u.. since i came into ur life.. aye i knoe u dun like mi to sae tt.. but i seem to haf onli brought u unhappiness.. i have not given up on u.. juz tt the relationship is reallie disappointing mi.. and i dunno wad to do.. =(